VAIN: A person who loves the smell of his own farts.
AMIABLE: A person who loves the smell of other people's farts.
PROUD: A person who thinks his farts are exceptionally fine.
SHY: A person who releases silent farts and then blushes.
IMPUDENT: A person who boldly farts out loud and then laughs.
UNFORTUNATE: A person who tries awfully hard to fart but shits instead.
SCIENTIFIC: A person who farts regularly but is only concerned about pollution.
NERVOUS: A person who stops in the middle of his fart.
HONEST: A person who admits he farted but offers good medical reasons.
DISHONEST: A person who farts and then blames the dog.
FOOLISH: A person who suppresses a fart for hours and hours.
THRIFTY: A person who has several good farts in reserve.
ANTI-SOCIAL: A person who excuses himself and farts in complete privacy.
STRATEGIC: A person who conceals his farts with loud coughing.
SADISTIC: A person who farts in bed and then fluffs the cover over his bedmate.
INTELLECTUAL: A person who can determine from the smell of his neighbor's fart precisely the latest food item consumed.
ATHLETIC: A person who farts at the slightest exertion.
MISERABLE: A person who would truly love to, but can't fart at all.
SENSITIVE: A person who farts and then starts crying.
Robert Chasmer -
(C) KAOS 1995-2000.