Poor Old Santa

(page last updated 15/12/98).

Not long ago at the North Pole, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip, but there were problems everywhere.

Four of his elves had gotten sick, and the trainee elves were just not producing the toys as fast as the regular ones. Santa was beginning to feel the pressure of being behind schedule.

Then, Mrs. Claus told Santa that her mother was coming to visit. This stressed Santa out even more. When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth, and two had jumped the fence and were out who-knows-where. More Stress.

Then, when he began to load the sleigh one of the boards cracked and a toy bag fell to the ground, scattering toys everywhere.

Santa was so frustrated that he went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whiskey. When he got to the cupboard, he found that the elves had hidden the liquor, and there was nothing to drink. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the coffee pot and it broke into hundreds of little pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom but found that mice had eaten the straw it was made from.

Just then the doorbell rang and Santa cussed his way to the door. He opened the door, and there was a little angel with a great big Christmas tree.

The angel said: "Where do you want me to stick this tree, Santa?"

And that, friends, is how the little angel came to be on top of the Christmas tree.

Jokes Index Robert Chasmer - (C) KAOS 1995-2000.