Elizabeth Taylors plastic surgeon

(page last updated 30/08/98).
Elizabeth Taylor goes to her plastic surgeon and asks him to decrease the size of her vagina. After having a few children, she says she's a bit floppy. She makes him swear that he will not tell anyone about her surgery. He agrees.

After the surgery, she wakes up and every wall in her room is filled with floral arrangements. She calls the doctor in, furious. "Where the hell did all these flowers come from? You promised me you wouldn't tell anyone!!"

"Don't worry, I haven't told a soul" he says. "The flowers on this wall here are from me - you've given me so many referrals over the years I just wanted to express my gratitude."

"What about those ones over there?" she asks him, still fuming.

"Those are from the nurses here at the clinic. You've done so much charitable work and raised awareness for things like AIDS and breast cancer, they wanted to thank you as well."

"OK, but what about these ones here?" she says.

"Those are from Ernie Kawolski." the doctor replies.

"Who the hell is he?" she demands.

"Ernie is one of our burn patients. He just wanted to thanks you for the new ears."

Jokes Index Robert Chasmer - (C) KAOS 1995-2000.